Saturday, March 17, 2012

Frat Life 101: The Pledge Class Sneak, Part 2

Frat Life 101 is an ongoing series of stories from the author's days as a pledge and member of an Animal House style fraternity, Zeta Chapter, Sigma Tau Gamma national fraternity in Tahlequah, Oklahoma in the early to mid 80s.

The Pledge Class Sneak

The one thing we brought to the barn dance was some general mayhem. We all were wearing our fraternity pledge shirts and the other Greek organizations recognized the letters but not us or the design of our shirts. They also quickly realized that we were another type of creature altogether than what they were used to. You see, our mantra (held over from the old guard members) when going someplace out of our area was "It's okay, we're from out of town." Somehow that made our actions not only all right but completely acceptable in our eyes. We proceeded to get trashed in epic fashion and at one point I saw Gary and Keith crawling around on all fours barking like dogs and biting girls on their posteriors. They were almost daring the girls boyfriends to do something about it which they wisely declined to do.

Most attendees at the barn dance were understandably aghast at our behavior. I mean really, we were wild and unruly cavemen who cared not for rules and societal pleasantries. I can't blame them one bit for their revulsion. After a few hours had gone by we got bored and drifted outside to hang out with each other. In our estimation this party was far too tame. Two girls came out to leave but couldn't get to their car as it had been completely blocked in. They asked for our assistance with their problem and being the chivalrous gentlemen that we were we immediately agreed to help. Our help consisted of us crowding around the cars that were blocking them in and one by one be started bouncing them to the side. It's quite the sight if you've never seen anything like it.

All we had to do was rapidly push up and down in unison on the car until it stared bouncing and then start moving it to the side. It worked and the girls were amused and happy that they could leave. We also saw this as a perfect time for us to leave as well lest we overstay our welcome and suffer a mob attack of biblical proportions from the masses inside that we could possibly have offended. With those thoughts in mind we gathered everyone together, drove to the fraternity house and picked up our members. Then we made our way to our accommodations for the evening which we were assured had been prepared well in advance. That turned out to be what looked like an abandoned barn seemingly in the middle of nowhere. It was fitting and par for the course but still, it offered a little bit of protection from the elements so it wasn't all bad.

The next morning we awoke and I'm sure we were a sight to see. Hungover, disheveled and unbathed we returned to town to prepare ourselves to make our way back home. In our less than perfect condition it seemed to be a longer drive than the one that had brought us here. Still, we soldiered on and piled back into the truck. When we reached the state line it was time for one last time honored tradition, a picture of the "moon." Whenever we could we would stop at the welcome or goodbye sign for any particular state and then as many as would wish would drop their trousers and flash the moon somebody else took a picture. I believe for our sneak it was termed the Six Moons Over Missouri photo. I still don't know what became of that picture or where it is today.

Eventually we pulled up to the fraternity house and staggered inside to have a few laughs with the members that didn't accompany us. Then one by one we started to disappear, most likely going to our dorm room, apartment or wherever we lived for some much needed sleep. The sneak was a success although given our condition that was a dubious distinction. This would prove to be the only sneak that I ever participated in. No pledge class after my own ever took me on their sneak. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

(Author's note: After writing this story I began to doubt if I remembered the correct university that we visited. Instead of waiting to verify it from one of my pledge class brothers I have decided to to post it and correct it later if necessary. In reality it takes nothing away form the story if I am wrong.)

Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.

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