This is something I started last Sunday and after a few days I had the time to look over it. I decided to change nothing for now. Perhaps in the future it may evolve but for now it is what it is. By the way, I was thinking of the song "Every Man For Himself" by Articles Of Faith.
A lonely man
A solitary one
Driven by fear
Pain and suffering
Hard lessons learned
Confusion abounds
Reluctant to change
Separate by choice
Suspicious of motive
Of strangers needs
Cynical and twisted
It comes down to
Controlling life's greed
Written and Published by Don Leach.
May not be used without permission from the author.
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Showing posts with label suffering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label suffering. Show all posts
Saturday, August 23, 2014
Thursday, March 1, 2012
The Health Saga Continues
Today should have been the day for my wife to have her knee surgery. As I have stated here before the doctor's office cancelled the surgery because of a problem with her thyroid. Then they sent her to have a thyroid scan by a specialist but the specialist decided that since she had an MRI two weeks (before while she was in the ER) that the dye used would interfere with the scan so they told her to come back in one month. Here's where it gets interesting. Yesterday she went back to the doctor and they were surprised about the delay for the scan. Amazingly they told my wife that they would contact the specialist and see about going ahead with the surgery. They also took some blood so that they could see what her thyroid level was at.
Today they called and told her that they were canceling the thyroid scan and gave her three possible dates for her surgery. We have to notify them tomorrow morning for which one we choose. I fail to understand how this has come about. It was such a serious thing that they cancelled her surgery outright yet now because of the delay they want to go ahead with the surgery as soon as possible. It makes no sense to me at all. Perhaps instead of jumping the gun they could have waited a few days and this all would have worked itself out and she could have had her surgery already earlier today.
No, that makes far too much sense. Better to make decisions without all of the facts than wait until you have it all. Unfortunately now an airline ticket for her mother has already risen in price drastically which may make it too difficult for her to come. This after we lost almost one hundred dollars on her last ticket because the doctor cancelled the surgery. You've got to love the American Medical system, ineptitude at it's finest. At least we can be consoled by the thought of her finally receiving some relief from her pain and suffering. After she recovers from the surgery we'll be able to start moving forward again which is an idea long past overdue.
This is all based on the premise that the doctor doesn't do something else silly like cancel it again. With everything that's gone on so far I wouldn't put it past them. I'll keep you posted.
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
Today they called and told her that they were canceling the thyroid scan and gave her three possible dates for her surgery. We have to notify them tomorrow morning for which one we choose. I fail to understand how this has come about. It was such a serious thing that they cancelled her surgery outright yet now because of the delay they want to go ahead with the surgery as soon as possible. It makes no sense to me at all. Perhaps instead of jumping the gun they could have waited a few days and this all would have worked itself out and she could have had her surgery already earlier today.
No, that makes far too much sense. Better to make decisions without all of the facts than wait until you have it all. Unfortunately now an airline ticket for her mother has already risen in price drastically which may make it too difficult for her to come. This after we lost almost one hundred dollars on her last ticket because the doctor cancelled the surgery. You've got to love the American Medical system, ineptitude at it's finest. At least we can be consoled by the thought of her finally receiving some relief from her pain and suffering. After she recovers from the surgery we'll be able to start moving forward again which is an idea long past overdue.
This is all based on the premise that the doctor doesn't do something else silly like cancel it again. With everything that's gone on so far I wouldn't put it past them. I'll keep you posted.
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
The First New Lyrics of November
I've taken a little time off from the blog but it hasn't been because I lack ideas to write about. Quite the opposite, I have many ideas but not much time to use on them. Also, I've had this feeling, I want to write but when the chance comes I can't bring myself to do it. It's not writers block, more like I allow myself to distract myself and end up running out of time without having accomplished anything. Perhaps that will change with this sudden surge of song lyrics that came pouring out of me last night at work.
I had already clocked out when they broke through and forced themselves onto my consciousness to the point that I couldn't deny them the time. The first came about in a few moments fueled by emotions held barely in check. The second came with an idea for the chorus first then followed by the song. Neither one of them took long (as you can tell) and both are very raw. We'll see what will happen to them in the future, which direction they take. Already I've started writing another song so more than likely parts of them will end up merged together to build one stronger, better song. I hope. That's usually the way it goes.
A Life Like This
The only words I hear you say
Are filled with negativity
The only sounds you make
Express misplaced anger
If that’s all you want to do
Then I’m done with this
I’ve got better things to do
It’s time to walk away
(Was it worth it?)
I don’t want to live
A life like this
I don’t need to live
A life like this
No problem is your problem
No need for made up drama
But there you go again
Making something from nothing
Now I’m sitting here with
My stomach tied in knots
You’re sitting there with
Your high priced excitement
(Was it worth it?)
Where do we go from here
As if there’s someplace to go
My patience it at its end
My head is about to explode
Don’t beat around the bush
Or hint about what you say
I won’t beat around the bush
Let the truth come out
(Is it worth it?)
You Don’t Love Me
Your anger bites sharply
Spit in its venomous zeal
Lashing out at the only one
You know can really feel
Chorus:
You don’t love me
(Do you love me)
You don’t love me
(Do you love me)
You don’t love me
Unless you love me
Will this storm blow over
Like a thousand times before
What does the future hold
I don’t really know anymore
You don’t like me
(Do you like me)
You don’t like me
(Do you like me)
You don’t like me
Unless you like me
If I run away to the hills
Until the wrath and fury are gone
Will you give up the search
Before I finish this song
You don’t know me
(Do you know me)
You don’t know me)
(Do you know me)
You don’t know me
Unless you know me
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
I had already clocked out when they broke through and forced themselves onto my consciousness to the point that I couldn't deny them the time. The first came about in a few moments fueled by emotions held barely in check. The second came with an idea for the chorus first then followed by the song. Neither one of them took long (as you can tell) and both are very raw. We'll see what will happen to them in the future, which direction they take. Already I've started writing another song so more than likely parts of them will end up merged together to build one stronger, better song. I hope. That's usually the way it goes.
A Life Like This
The only words I hear you say
Are filled with negativity
The only sounds you make
Express misplaced anger
If that’s all you want to do
Then I’m done with this
I’ve got better things to do
It’s time to walk away
(Was it worth it?)
I don’t want to live
A life like this
I don’t need to live
A life like this
No problem is your problem
No need for made up drama
But there you go again
Making something from nothing
Now I’m sitting here with
My stomach tied in knots
You’re sitting there with
Your high priced excitement
(Was it worth it?)
Where do we go from here
As if there’s someplace to go
My patience it at its end
My head is about to explode
Don’t beat around the bush
Or hint about what you say
I won’t beat around the bush
Let the truth come out
(Is it worth it?)
You Don’t Love Me
Your anger bites sharply
Spit in its venomous zeal
Lashing out at the only one
You know can really feel
Chorus:
You don’t love me
(Do you love me)
You don’t love me
(Do you love me)
You don’t love me
Unless you love me
Will this storm blow over
Like a thousand times before
What does the future hold
I don’t really know anymore
You don’t like me
(Do you like me)
You don’t like me
(Do you like me)
You don’t like me
Unless you like me
If I run away to the hills
Until the wrath and fury are gone
Will you give up the search
Before I finish this song
You don’t know me
(Do you know me)
You don’t know me)
(Do you know me)
You don’t know me
Unless you know me
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Love, Marriage and Illness
The alarm clock sounded for the second time and instead of hitting the snooze button again he shut it off and struggled to his feet. Squinting his eyes against the light he stumbled to the bathroom and relieved his bladder and following that as he washed his hands he stared at his image in the mirror. For most of his life he had looked younger than he was, even after he started losing his hair. Now though, the events of the recent months had taken their toll on him and his true age was starting to show. He sighed and thought briefly how it is inevitable that everybody gets older before veering sharply away from the direction those thoughts would take him in. Not now, there would be plenty of time during the day for that.
After a small breakfast, which was all he had ever been able to stomach, he washed the dishes and took his shower then dressed and before he knew it the time had come for him to go. He caught a taxi and looked at the all too familiar buildings along the way. The multitude of taxi drivers rarely varied the route so he let his mind drift a bit and very shortly he was there. Slowly he walked up the sidewalk and in the front door and turned left at the first hallway he came across followed by a right turn into another hallway and in a few feet he was there. Room 317. He emitted a heavy sigh and tried to let go of any negative feelings he had. It would do no good to go into the room in that frame of mind.
Forcing a smile on his face he pushed the door open and beheld her, his love. She fastened her gaze upon him, momentarily unsure of who this man was before it all came back to her. He told her how beautiful she was. She said that it was a lie. He told her how much he loved her, how special she was. She denied it all. She was tired of this place, didn't like the doctors and the staff was so rude. He could only tell her to be patient, perhaps soon she could come home. She fixed a fiery gaze at him and asked who he was. Why are you even here? The man weathered her storm of anger, after all, given her condition it was to be understood. Even though it was difficult seeing her this way it had to be incredibly worse to see it from her view.
Her anger dissipated into meandering stories about her life and shortly after that sleep came to her. This was his cue, his time to leave and go out into the world where he could briefly distract himself from the problems of life. He had work to do so that the bills could be paid and food bought. In the evening he would make his way here again to be by her side, silently listening to the same questions and stories all over again, in this building that normally housed people much older than her that was now her home. No, that word isn't correct at all he thought darkly. This is merely her residence, it's not a home at all. A home is a place where love, hope and dreams live. None of that can be found here, this place has no soul and is only where her body resides and occasionally, if he was lucky, he was able to catch frighteningly short glimpses of the woman he had loved his whole life. Most of the time that woman no longer existed, but sometimes, for those few, short moments she came back to him and those moments of clarity are what he now lived for.
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
After a small breakfast, which was all he had ever been able to stomach, he washed the dishes and took his shower then dressed and before he knew it the time had come for him to go. He caught a taxi and looked at the all too familiar buildings along the way. The multitude of taxi drivers rarely varied the route so he let his mind drift a bit and very shortly he was there. Slowly he walked up the sidewalk and in the front door and turned left at the first hallway he came across followed by a right turn into another hallway and in a few feet he was there. Room 317. He emitted a heavy sigh and tried to let go of any negative feelings he had. It would do no good to go into the room in that frame of mind.
Forcing a smile on his face he pushed the door open and beheld her, his love. She fastened her gaze upon him, momentarily unsure of who this man was before it all came back to her. He told her how beautiful she was. She said that it was a lie. He told her how much he loved her, how special she was. She denied it all. She was tired of this place, didn't like the doctors and the staff was so rude. He could only tell her to be patient, perhaps soon she could come home. She fixed a fiery gaze at him and asked who he was. Why are you even here? The man weathered her storm of anger, after all, given her condition it was to be understood. Even though it was difficult seeing her this way it had to be incredibly worse to see it from her view.
Her anger dissipated into meandering stories about her life and shortly after that sleep came to her. This was his cue, his time to leave and go out into the world where he could briefly distract himself from the problems of life. He had work to do so that the bills could be paid and food bought. In the evening he would make his way here again to be by her side, silently listening to the same questions and stories all over again, in this building that normally housed people much older than her that was now her home. No, that word isn't correct at all he thought darkly. This is merely her residence, it's not a home at all. A home is a place where love, hope and dreams live. None of that can be found here, this place has no soul and is only where her body resides and occasionally, if he was lucky, he was able to catch frighteningly short glimpses of the woman he had loved his whole life. Most of the time that woman no longer existed, but sometimes, for those few, short moments she came back to him and those moments of clarity are what he now lived for.
Written and Published by Don Leach. May not be used without permission from the author.
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